Friday, January 31, 2014


that redbull and cigarette smell
I probably miss it
making Esther Raushenbush 
Library an alright place to be
like a scary party
our favorite things are there
to push back against our least favorite things
to sneak underneath, above, and around them
like its happenstance that we are where we are
but can you directly base your life
on whiskers on kittens? I'm trying…
like that one night we all played in the dirt
why did we only do that once
no one’s “hey beautiful” will ever
mean the same thing to us.
we’ll be wishing it was around
every corner for the rest of our lives.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

ah year

Will I ever be at a dog park at dusk in California?

all I got is the desert
for y'all how many
times I said desert

makes my nose bleed

all my love for
silver nitrate face
and crater face
all my love to
the fall of

Why would I ever?

remember emotions
are not obsolete and
everything can still
got to do with


it's a massage on my
feet the bumps
on the street ramps

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Monday, January 27, 2014


shotgun watching
the hills and the
sunset behind 
the Budweiser factory
I’m feeling you

you’re everywhere 
but I can’t see you 

we're listening for you
your voice is echoing
in the car speakers
and the air through
the windows smells
like pennies in a 

going going going 
going gone gone
gone gone


alright children, don’t yell at each other
I’m praying for a resolution between you two


this song was 
Don't be afraid
I won't hurt you
I'm just searching
for something  
I'm not sure of
With my net
Chasing the elusive 
butterfly of love
Or something like that


walking down the 
street being a girl 
seeing an empty 
bottle of Bombay 

thinking about how 
to draw what exactly 
that means to me
and how to draw a 
baby who is hopeless
*allegorical action shot*

living vicariously 
through that
the Sapphire Stranger
it is a glass bottle 
laying dewy in the 

dewy and I’m just 
walking past it
must have been a 
wild in the grass

living vicariously
through the reflective
tape on a mans coat
flashing in our headlights
as we drive past him in the dark
that is not my life

dropping off my sister 
at a boarded up house
where she slips through 
the chain link 
and disappears along 
side it
there is no light at all 
coming from inside it
it must be exciting 
to be the bad ones
inside it

a friend of hers 
works on old houses 
like that one and his 
boss lets him sleep 
in them

one time in the attic 
of a little victorian
his hand impulsively 
reached up to one
of the rafters and he 
pulled down a red purse 

inside the purse 
was a handful 
of gold jewelry
a gun, and a torn
out newspaper 
article about a 
missing girl with 
a red purse

Monday, January 13, 2014


All of the building’s exteriors at high school
had white plaster reliefs of the 
Greek gods and goddesses

some standing two stories tall 
or flying outstretched above windows

This represents knowledge, 
this represents athleticism. 
Over that archway is science. 

The Greeks looking down on fist fights 
and all the different models of sneaker

the white styrofoam takeout containers
gulls swarmed the courtyard at lunch

I was looking at pictures of Shaker houses 
in National Geographic, obsessing over 
the sparse dark feeling of those halls

Hands to work and hearts to God 

Jane always had something 
she would offer me. Tamarind 
seed pods, witchy dense green 
pistachio candy

She was greasy lady luck

We would leave through the back 
of the H building and go to the park 
called Ohlone

Once when we left
she found both a packet of gum 
and a packet of sleeping pills 
on the sidewalk 

I need these. I keep finding exactly what I need 

She wanted the gum but 
needed to use the pills on 
someone else

Tuesday, January 7, 2014


Heaven and Earth are not humane: To them all things are as straw-dogs.

I didn’t remember 
seeing a lunar eclipse 
in my dream until he 
yelled at you: What will 
it take for you to be 
ready?? What are you 
waiting for?? A lunar 
eclipse?? Then it rode 
up to me like a black 
horse a black horse on 
horseback. Imagining 
the arching. Like how 
the moon she laying down
crescent on her side
sweating; I can’t make 
up my mindHeaven 
and earth are not 

Friday, January 3, 2014

no where

no where

I dream about you all night long
the more I acknowledge it the more I dream
Juicywet aloe
fatty pink camellia
Rolling past my high school
the field where I played soccer for p.e. credit
That is something
That is a plus
I miss the way your eyes could be like saucers of that color for me
I could look in them and see you at twelve years old
The Afghan Girl from National Geographic