Friday, February 27, 2015

Bad Seed



my dad and stepmom had another child when I was away
I haven't met her yet and she is already four years old
her name is Rosie
she has dark brown hair and a face tattoo of a broken heart
I want to get to know her so I go home
she sits on my lap and stabs me in the eye 3 times
with one end of her plastic headband
I try reasoning with her but she keeps hurting me
I cry because I know she has no human warmth in her
it breaks my heart to find out she is a bad seed

Brittany Reservoir


at 4 am 
she woke up with a sudden fever 
and let all her loved ones know 
that TSS 
might get the best of her

she even considered
quickly burning her diaries

"I'll die in my diary!"
written in there 
somewhere

at 8 am 
she woke up
and there was so much white fog 
that the mountains were completely invisible

she got the feeling 
of needing to solve it 
like a problem 
like spilt milk on the countertop





Thursday, February 26, 2015

like a real





In the event of
stretching my legs

I'll see the half moon 
on the blue afternoon sky 
and a Christian education center
and some LA bumper stickers

I'll be blinking at Valencia's
suspiciously healthy grass
so glowing green that
I'm ready for a dinosaur 

don't people know 
that worrying doesn't get you 
to the place you're worrying about 
not getting to?


try writing self help


why do I feel like I know
essentially
how to be alive? 
I mean
one step at a time 
but
don't worry
walking around sweater
tied around my waist
not loving my outfit
not wearing a bra

how old do they think I am?

horrible things don't 
need to happen in order 
for someone to be worth listening to

right?

the man behind me 
is on a motor scooter 
I think because he can't walk
and he's listening to an audio book
out loud

LeRoi Jones said it
ghosts 
of after school figures 
who live here? 

toddlers wearing jeans...
middle schoolers wearing
big backpacks and new
primary colors

cool authority
with an earring

cul-de-sac-ville 

Old Course way
a shooter somewhere
a lockdown
a big belly
sunglasses and
fancy flip flops
meaningless shadows
Novela way
bikey boys
doors without windows
Dorado drive
Merry Pope
Chimney Rock road
it's not what it sounds like
gridded shrubs
who's who's
this attitude
this "bridge"
"this" place!

my man on the scooter
seeing it all the same?
unless he's blind or

Avenida jolita
has this park ever been dangerous?
a shooter somewhere
they're taking a video
a girl with a spray bottle 
on the basketball court

pretty sisters smile at me
on their after school bike ride
what do they know?
I'm "very interested" 
in gum spots and pretty sisters

a shady non-bench
a barking squirrel

let the sun be inside of me
let the flies be in front of me

positioned near a pool
outside it's gate so
alone in the day that 
I'm calling attention 
to my legs if I stretch them




Thursday, February 19, 2015

nah


sitting up to cough at night
barking like a dog in bed
the night is black and I am blue
there used to be so many fun 
places to hide




Thursday, February 12, 2015

This Time in Part






all the years that have felt the same for so long
feel different now
all the comin' round the bends
sit awkwardly on top
of the oblong calendar 
I made up as a kid
the year on saturn's rings
like spin art or
cotton candy
now rollerskating off into space









take off my shirt
put it back on
inside out
take off my shirt
put it back on
right side out
take off my shirt
put it back on
inside out