after half a year of
psychic frostbite
I find myself abruptly
spilled open like a
cherry cordial
tears befall me here
and now then and
there again
throughout the day
warm and soft like
the bathtub Atlantic
I walk to the beach
stopping at the Brady’s
Yacht Club plastic
white patio fence
to get a cigarette from
a man who offers me
a choice of Newport
or Marb Lite
I go sit in the sand
lightly scolding myself
for the passing thought
that the beach is like
one enormous ashtray
silly girl, bad
now best say sorry
to our maker
sorry :) it was a joke
I will quit when I’m 30
& thank you
for so suddenly and
lovingly topping
off my glass
how awful
was that great
hermitude
it felt so
sincerely endless
but was just
a long bad
dream
I’ll never again forget
that family friendship
love comfort
privacy
emotions
and daydreams
are an utter
privilege
to have in surplus
the way I do
I cry me a river
that leads to
your ocean
but happily
this time
