point

what i want to say

i want to just

present my heart

a record that is personal

and in the present tense

a where have i been

a what have i been thinking

for the past 5 years

it may all be enough

or more than i've thought it was

i always want to hear the most personal

not as in a trauma mapping

but as in the hyper specific

impressions and delusions 

we all have

i want to say that my reality is office mundane

and the flipcoin to a genocide

that i want to be stronger than all of it

but i am tightroping 

the idea that some are 

bitten by angels

and others are kissed

by death

and we want to fight

for each other 

but the divide is on purpose

the distance just by chance

i want to be

an enemy of the smooth 

the everyone a pop star

lying by omission

for the sake of the package

claiming style 

with no margin of error 

omitting marginalia

omitting uncertainty

claiming a selfhood

unique, solid

as brandishable as a weapon

brandishing brand

so tired of looking at that

untitled (physical graffiti)

I wish it could be so both

like 2 tights and 2 looses

could get between around I mean

I live here, crawling over the lucite sphere 

of the mix all clammy by get I mean into 

taste the latent painting,

the subterranean set of facts or

do I draw? dancers pulling silk scarves from 

the center of an old tire this tilted memory 

palace postcard holographic and 

psychic you passing cloud black 

and yellow buff like a chance 

Rothko, jealous 

of such crystalized obsession

me doing everything erasing

itself while power just is 

everything around the corner

it’s the morning everything

comes to me, the morning

I see everything getting warmer

everything on fire I always try to

do everything [it] gets watery

while spirit just is where it is 

and was, a Whole Lotta Love

conjures time in full, drops of 

fog drown my song

the mist rushes up from the canyon

the valley is really a V

forgot about god and wet water 

'til it came backwards to me

the dream was all night

missing some Bolinas type 

cliff, archer watching me

in the rain she said mural as

I walked on the broken roof 

tuned to the entire radio